My Lasik Experience ---- Wanda

I had bilateral Lasik in April 30, 1997. I wore thick eyeglasses
since I was eight years old and when soft contacts were out I thought they were the greatest invention on Earth. Finally I could get rid of my coke bottles!!! I wore several kinds of contacts during the next 22 years and all of them gave me good vision. I also had astigmatism and when toric lenses were available for the first time then my vision was absolutely perfect with them.
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WHY I DECIDED TO HAVE LASIK

At the end of 1996 I had an allergic reaction to the contact lens
solution I was using and ended up with a bad case of keratitis. I
had to stay away from my contacts for three months and go back to glasses. My vision with glasses was never good. Being so nearsighted at -11.25 with -1.25 of astigmatism, glasses did not really correct my vision in a natural way like contacts did. I lost all my depth perception and hit my mailbox with my car three times in six weeks!!!
By that time I was already hearing all the ads about Lasik. Of
course I knew about RK and ALK and even went once for an evaluation many years ago. But I was too nearsighted for these procedures and they told me to wait for a "new and very 'accurate' procedure with lasers" that could help me. I never gave
it a second thought because I am a very conservative person when
it comes to my health and I was VERY happy with my contacts. But after three months of constant frustration over my vision with glasses and fearing that I could never wear contacts again I started reading about Lasik with much more interest. I did a very extensive research, talk to several doctors (optometrists and ophthalmologists) including my brother who is an internal medicine doctor. They all told me that they have heard very good things about this procedure but that it was still not approved by the FDA.

I had heard about this very experienced surgeon in my area and
went to him for an initial evaluation. I checked his credentials and they were impeccable. He told me that I was an excellent candidate given
the criteria at that time. I had healthy eyes, clear corneas, I was not
diabetic, I didn't smoke, didn't have any thyroid problems, no dry eyes, no glaucoma and general perfect health. He sent me to a retina specialist to make sure my retinas were fine and they were. He gave me several names of patients with my same degree of nearsightedness. I called them, met them and they were all delighted with the results.

I probably asked that doctor hundreds of questions and he answered all my e-mails, phone calls etc. I remember being concerned about night
driving and side effects. He only told me that I would probably need reading glasses, something that I didn't mind at all. When I insisted on any possible bad outcomes, he told me that the worst thing that could happen was that I could be left a little nearsighted and probably will need a thin pair of glasses to drive. I asked him if I could go back to contacts in that case and he said "SURE but don't worry because most patients do not need any correction after the surgery" The fact that I was VERY nearsighted didn't seem to concern him at all.
He told me that a very insignificant percentage might need an
enhancement and that it was included in the initial cost. He told me not to worry so much, that everything was going to be fine.

To me, everything seemed too good to be true. It was extremely TEMPTING to be able to see without correction. At that time I still trusted doctors, I thought that they would never knowingly do
something that could damage a person's health or well being.
Finally I made my mind and decided to go ahead with the surgery.
The consent form was given to me three days before the surgery and I was terrified when I read it. The doctor and the technicians told me
not to worry too much, that everything said there was "standard" for every minor surgery. When I asked about the possible catastrophes mentioned there they only smiled and told me those things were worst case scenarios that seldom, if ever, happened. And of course, they never had a single case of something going wrong. And if there were problems they made it sound like everything could be fixed. I wasn't too convinced yet but I had already paid the deposit and felt that I just had to do it. I had already made financial arrangements, my husband had taken a week off from work....everything was ready.

Later I tried to put all the negative thoughts behind and think in a positive way. After all, I was in good hands and why would that slight chance of something going wrong would happen to ME?

THE SURGERY

I still remember how excited I was about all this until the day
before the surgery. I was involved getting everything ready when suddenly I had the strangest sensation. It was like I was overwhelmed at the thought of having something done to my only pair of eyes. I started sweating and it was like a panic attack, something I have never experienced in my life. I just started crying and wanted to call to cancel the surgery. Then I calmed down and tried to convince myself that it was normal to be a little nervous. I had the weirdest dream that night, I was rollerblading and I saw everything gray and blurry. I asked for my glasses and even with them I couldn't see well. The next day I went to the office and while they were preparing my eyes for the surgery all I was thinking was how I wished I could just run away from that place.

This is something that I will never forget because I should have
trusted that gut feeling and get away from there but was too scared to do so. The surgery went well, I felt no pain and everything was quick.
When I opened my eyes I could not believe how well I could see. My right eye was 20-30 and my left was a little blurry but I could see the chart and the faces of everyone there. The next few days I could see very well and vision was 20-20 and 20-30. I was thrilled and amazed at how good my vision was!! Better than with contacts!!!
At night I saw little halos and starbursts but the vision was
clear. YES, my Lasik was initially a big success! I never had a problem with dry eyes or photosensitivity, the vision was great and my eyes felt great. What a relief!!

TWO WEEKS LATER......AND THE BEGINNING OF MY ORDEAL

I woke up one morning just to see that instead of one alarm clock I saw
three. Suddenly everything was blurry, very blurry. My first thought was
that I have done something terrible to my flaps so I called my doctor right away. He checked me, did another topography and everything was fine, flaps were fine. It was only "fluctuations" and the "healing process" Night vision started getting worse to the point that I could no longer drive at night. Vision in dim light conditions was terrible and the glare bothered me so much that I had vertigo mostly all day. Every day was worse and I was in a state of PANIC because I felt that something was terribly wrong and nobody cared. I almost LIVED in the doctor's office and he kept reassuring me that every thing was fine and that I should be happy with my vision because I was much less nearsighted than before. Nobody seemed to understand the horrible aberrations that I saw all the time.

For the next few months I was very depressed and very scared, I couldn't believe that this was happening to me. My doctor turned very cold with me, he didn't take my calls or e-mails anymore. Once he only told me that if I wanted an enhancement I would have to pay for it. That my case was very unusual and that maybe I was being too demanding and wanted "perfect" vision and I should be happy to be "functional" At that time I had regressed to 20-100 and 20-200, plus the package of side effects (starbursts halos, ghosting, "the works") How in the world he expected me to be functional with that kind of vision? I needed glasses all the time and I could NOT see well with them either.

Of course I lost all my trust in this doctor. I was shocked that
he wanted to charge me full price for an enhancement. Even his staff was shocked because enhancements were usually included in the initial fee. Still, wanting to give him the benefit of the doubt, I thought that maybe there was a contraindication in my case for an enhancement and he didn't want to tell me so. Charging me for an enhancement was possibly a tactful way of discouraging me. Well, I checked several opinions among other ophthalmologists including a corneal specialist. My eyes were fine and no one saw any reason that could
contraindicate an enhancement.

It was hard for everybody to believe my surgeon attitude towards me. It was like he was angry at me because I had bad results. Later I learned that his Laser, was confiscated by the FDA. Six months after my surgery he died of a heart attack. I could never recover my records and never heard an explanation of what could have happened
to me. I am glad I didn't have the enhancement after all. I lost all my trust in this doctor. I couldn't afford going to another surgeon and pay
full price again for another surgery. Since I was not undercorrected and no one could explain me the cause of my sudden regression I didn't want to take the risk of having another surgery only to have the same problems, fluctuations and agony all over again. And there was always a chance of having complications from the surgery and a chance that my side effects would be worse than before.

Since then, my life had become a constant agonizing over my vision,
a constant search for seconds, thirds, fouth..opinions, fluctuating vision
that would go from a -1.00 to a -6.00.....more glasses....contact
lenses......frustration to see that nothing seems to work. But the biggest frustration of all is the feeling that I was the ONLY person that ever had a bad outcome with Lasik. I was about to believe that doctors were right and that "everything was on my mind" Not a single doctor could find anything wrong with my eyes. Flaps were fine, no epithelial cells, no wrinkles, no dry eyes, no retinal problems. But my vision kept regressing and the ghosting, double and triple vision, glare problems, lack of contrast sensitivity, etc., kept getting worse. I tried explaining this to all the doctors that saw me and NO one could understand what in the world I meant by halos or starbursts or foggy vision or glare etc.

The truth is that I know that most of the doctors I saw were very competent and I know they all tried to help me. Others were very cold,
couldn't understand my vision problems and it was like I was speaking a foreign language to them. I was labeled as whiny and hypochondriac by a few people. I can understand that people with normal vision have no idea of how is my vision after this surgery. The problem here is that post Lasik eyes is a new field and most doctors have no experience fitting corneas that are not "normal" anymore. Conventional contact lenses do not work. Scleral lenses and other specialty lenses could be the answer but it is very difficult to find someone who has experience fitting those. so, what are we supposed to do? Where are we supposed to go for help? I was told several times that there was "nothing to do" in my case after trying so many contact lenses without results.

Most doctors gave up on me after a few weeks saying that they have tried everything and they didn't know what else to do with me. I don't blame any on them, I KNOW that my eyes are a challenge to even the most experienced doctors.

But I was devastated. I felt completely abandoned to my luck and even thought about suicide a couple oftimes. I have always been a very cheerful and optimistic person by nature. But there were moments when I just felt that there was no point in living like this. I felt disabled, could no longer drive, go to the movies, go out at night. I took my two daughters out of all their after school activities because I couldn't drive after 5:00PM. I dreaded to open my eyes in the mornings knowing what was ahead of me, double vision, glare etc. I lost seven pounds because of my constant vertigo. I have to give up my passion for reading, oil painting, gardening and all the things I loved to do. I am an accountant and no longer working.

And still, everybody just stared at me wondering why I was so unhappy, after all I went from a --11.00 to a -2.00 so I was BETTER than before. And EVERYBODY else out there was thrilled with
their post Lasik vision so why was I whining so much?......I
started thinking that it was all my fault. After all, my DISABILITY was caused by MY decision to have this surgery.

Until I found Surgical Eyes I felt I was the only one with these problems. It has been a very difficult ordeal for me, one of those things that you think will never happen to you. It has been the worst nightmare
coming true.

Fortunately, my optimistic nature has taken over again. I decided that
feeling sorry for myself is not going to take me anywhere. So I
am way past the "WHY ME? phase and now devote all my energy in finding solutions for my problems and to help others in every way I can. I have researched so much about contact lenses that sometimes I feel I am better informed than some doctors. I know for sure that someday this nightmare will end and that I will find that perfect pair of contacts that will give me MY VISION AND MY LIFE BACK. No more elective eye surgeries for me, one was more than enough.

LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL

Fortunately, I finally found an optometrist who was not only very
experienced, he was willing to work with me in restoring my vision. He is a very kind and compassionate person who, like me, doesn't give up easily. He tried everything there is to try and every time he tried something new, I knew I was closer to find the perfect solution to my problems.

It was by reading the Surgical Eyes board that I heard about the Macrolenses for the first time. I then search the web page for these lenses, printed the information and took it to my doctor. One of the things that I like the most about him is that he is open minded, and he LISTENS. He fitted me with these lenses and they were able to correct ALL my post surgical problems. For people like us a good optometrist is like a rare jewel. I have found that jewel in Dr Yager, from Orlando, Florida whom I cannot thank enough. Also Dr. Bridget William who recently joined his practice and who has worked very closely with me in the Macrolenses fitting. Finally I am seeing light at the end of the tunnel. These lenses have completely restore my perfect vision day AND night and so far,with no side effects.

I thank God every minute of the day for my new vision, I have my life back. I cannot thank Dr. Yager, Dr William and Surgical Eyes enough, for giving me this second chance. It pays off to be persistent!!! So to all of you reading this, DON'T GIVE UP, life CAN be good again. To think that only a couple of months ago I could not see a future for me, I was ready to give up hope after three years of agony. Who would have known that my solution was about to come. I know all of us have to go through a grieving period , it is necessary to go through this to be able to put it behind and move forward. Maybe the answer to our problems will come sooner than we expected. We must never lose FAITH . We must keep a positive attitude. A negative attitude will not help at all, in fact, it can keep us from solving our problems.


MY OPINION ABOUT LASIK

I am not against Lasik. I KNOW it CAN be a great procedure because I experienced the "miracle" of great vision for a few days. The
majority of people that undergo this procedure are very happy. However, the risks are very real and many doctors may not even be aware of all of them. Even with what happened to me I don''t put all the blame on my doctor, I am sure he was very experienced and with the criteria that was prevalent at that time, maybe I was a good candidate. Pupil size was not an issue back then and the possibility of regression among high myopes seemed very unlikely with Lasik.

However I DO resent his lack of support when I started deteriorating so quickly, I resent that he never mentioned anything about night
vision or that contact lenses were going to be so hard to fit, etc., etc. When my problems started he didn't even want to hear about me. I am realistic enough to know that doctors are not GOD and that they can't know everything. But a different attitude toward my problems would have made a world of difference for me.

It takes a combination of factors to make a successful Lasik happen:
1.A competent doctor, that is, one that has not only the SKILLS but also HONESTY and INTEGRITY. Honesty to be able to put a patient's best interest before his interest in money and integrity to explain the risks in detail and rule out a not so good candidate. A good surgeon must also be prepared to offer not only solutions if something goes wrong but moral support.

2. The ideal candidate.... something very hard to define. Must
have realistic expectations, good eye health in general and a very good reason to want to get rid of contacts or glasses. Also, and this is the most difficult part, realize that if something goes wrong there is no way back, this is not
reversible.

My advice to all the people who ask me about Lasik is always the same: If your vision is good with contacts or glasses why risk
something good for something that can be fantastic IF everything turns out fine or can ruin your life forever if something goes wrong? The risk is minimal but if it happens to you, you are stuck forever.